Good day to you all where ever you may be in this world. Today I have short interview with Would Be for you.
I must say your blog is the reason I started blogging, I could relate to a lot of things you wrote about. Who or what was it that made you want to get Tales of a Would Be Degenerate up and running?
Much the same as I influenced you, I was influenced by LuckyJimm’s blog. At the time I could relate a lot to what he had to say but at the same time saw myself in a completely different light. We both lived degenerate lives and were controlled by gambling addiction. His problem was PL Omaha, mine was Hold’em and sports betting, but at the end of the night we’d both have the same in our wallet. He came across as someone who found it difficult to socialise, difficult to meet women, difficult to entertain people, etc.. And I wanted to put my life into words as a completely different outlook on things but with the same fundamental mental illness. I’ve never had problems with the things in life that many others, yourself included JR, find difficult, but I felt the need to show that as much as it looks rosy from the outside, on the inside the pain and struggle is a major issue.
You have expressed to me how excellent you think Bossanova's blog is. What then do you make of his post about the time he bought some new shoes?
I can see that someone’s trying to be provocative here. You’re right, though, I do really rate Bossa’s blog and it’s one of the first that I check each day for updates. I appreciate his wit and ease of writing. The shoe post? I just assumed that he’d not found anything to write about that day but still felt like getting something down. It wasn’t his best post, but we’ve all been there. I know I’m often guilty of boring and meaningless posts, especially when I drone on about bad beats. I for one can forgive Bossa a bad post or two as on the whole his blog makes me laugh. Why did you ask me about that post and not about the one he wrote about the hot girls on the bus? That post was excellent.
So are you saying it was meaningless and boring? Thats a bit harsh. I liked the post and the picture of the shoe. Bossa's is one of the blogs I always read, he does seem a natural writer I agree.
What did you make of the whole Black Belt Poker fiasco? Is it true you cried when Steve Holden was told he would only get a blue belt at best (or was it red) and quit the Big Brother House of Poker?
To be honest, I couldn’t really follow what was going on and what it was all about. All I was seeing each day were results showing sick losses! Did you understand the process?
I was hoping he would do well but it all seemed like a bit of a con in the end. I stopped following it when he left but I didn't cry.
I quite fancy Rosie but in the main I just annoy her. Now you have many women after you, all of them beautiful. But just how would you go about pulling a woman like Rosie and do you think she is out of your league intellectually?
How can you fancy her? You’ve never seen her. She might be a pig-dog. Not saying she is, I’ve never seen her either. How would I go about pulling Rosie? I wouldn’t! What would be the point in trying to pull someone who so isn’t my type. Our views are polar opposites, our readings are opposites, I presume she’s middle class and lives in a nice home. We come from different worlds. Rosie drinks wine, I drink pints. Out of my league intellectually? I’m yet to meet a single person that I would say that about. I’m not as silly as I come across, and can raise or lower my game depending on opponent. I’m 100% sure that Rosie would like to be pulled by someone like me as much as I’d like to pull her. Saying that, if I turned it on, she’d go weak at the knees. :-)
Ok, perhaps fancy was the wrong choice of word. I doubt Rosie is a 'pig dog'! and I was just jesting with the intellectual jibe. Can two people not get on if they drink different drinks?
You speak four languages fluently, you are a talented writer, you are young and good looking. What do you feel when you are down to your last $5 on Labrokes and the ineviatable 'bad beat' comes along and you don't have the bus fare to make the date you had arranged for the next day? Is it time to stop gambling?
It’s always time to stop gambling, but then what do I do? How do I replace the thing that’s been the mainstay of my life for the past 12 years? I’m weak. If I were a strong person, I’d stop tomorrow. I’d stop right now. But what can I do? I’ve been telling myself I’m gonna get out of it for years but it’s outlasted everything else good that I’ve had in my life. When I’m sitting up til 4 in the morning playing $5 games on Ladbrokes I look at myself and see the ridiculousness of it all, especially when, as you say, I get a text asking if I want to meet someone and I have to make excuses as to why I can’t make it. By the way, is that your way of trying to get into my pants? By telling me I’m young and good-looking? You should’ve private messaged me that bit, not put it here for the whole world to see me shun your advances. Poof.
You are not sucking me into your sordid Brighton underworld. Infact you are not sucking me at all.
6 hrs 16 mins. Thats the time you spent in the Labrokes $3 High Stack a week or so a go. Only to bubble 11th for $7.50 when a big stack with A7 called your JJ all in and hit 2 x 7 on the flop. This was one of the funniest moments I have ever seen in poker, but you were not amused, can you see the funny side of it now?
Glad I entertained.
Still hurting I see. I shant push this matter any further, when I beat you in the $5 HU you took down your blog for a month!
Where do you see yourself in 5 years? (without getting all dramatic about being dead).
Who knows? Probably like you. Still going from day to day trying to find the next bit of gambling money. But then again, something or someone might make me change my life. I wouldn’t bet on it, though. Actually I would. I always back a loser. If I can finish writing my book and get a publisher then I might just find a way of expressing myself through the medium of writing and get paid enough to sleep under a roof and eat from it. Time will tell. The final option is that I’ll be dead. It’s not me being dramatic, it’s a possibility. With my recurring bouts of depression and my history you can never know what will take hold of me. All I know is how I feel at any given moment. Right now I feel optimistic. As well as depression related possibilities, there's also the excesses. If someone offers me drugs I never say no. I haven't been doing too many lately but I have just met a group of people that I know are into EVERYTHING, and sometimes I just lie and bed and dream of getting wasted and being found lying unconscious on the floor choking on my own vomit. It just seems like a cool way to go.
No, it is not a cool way to go. Sigh.
I like your posts about your family. Like the time when you tried to stab your brother in law for example. Now I know your Dad winds you up? Can you put this into words about how he makes you feel and try to offer up an explanation of why?
My dad’s brain is destroyed. He’ll drink 7 or 8 cans of Special Brew on a day off as well as any spirits he can get his hands on. He’s aggressive, mostly towards my mum, although not anymore when I’m around as I’ve had to show him on a couple of occasions that I wouldn’t think twice about giving him a slap if I had to. He doesn’t know what day it is half the time and he just infuriates me and puts me on tilt any time he’s around. But then I have to listen to everybody who knows us telling me that I’m so like him and that you can see I’m his son and all the rest of it. That just makes me angry. He gets pissed and then starts winding me up telling me that I’m a loser and a gambler and so on, but won’t ever accept that he’s an alcoholic. Pot calling the kettle black. When I watch him turning the house upside down tying to find enough pennies to pay for another can, I see myself. Our vice’s are different but the need is the same. If he’d stop drinking I’d happily make a pledge with him to stop my gambling, but every time I’ve put this offer on the table it’s been thrown back at me. Fuck him, his liver will give up on him in the next few years and he’ll be gone. He’s slowly dying and everyone can see it. The violent daily vomiting being the main tell. There’s no two ways about it, he won’t last much longer.
A big thanks to Would Be. Questions we didn't get round to were as follows.
How is your crusade for 'Free Amyl Nitrate for ALL in Brighton' coming along?
Is Amatay's arse hairly and spotty?
Much love all.
JR
6 comments:
You dick! lol.
Trying to get me in the shit with a couple of the questions there, not to mention your after-comments.
Looking forward to seeing who you get next in the hot seat. Doubt anyone will fancy it after reading some of these questions.
"to sleep under a roof and eat from it" . . . surely if you could afford a roof over you're head you could eat under it and a few plates would be budgetable (is that a word?) lol . . .
Funny post!!!!
he does get a bit dramatic sometimes...
I have to say it would be a laugh coming along to the meet in Notts. Money is tight though, sigh.
And the Oscar goes to....
I enjoyed that Gent's, thanks for taking the time. My dad was a drunken, violent, abusive c*nt for many years till his health finally gave out, been a changed man for the last 10 years. BTW, I did a little interview with Steve H about BBP, won't post a link as that's a bit naughty, there a link to it on my blog.
You two need to get a room, preferably with Rosie. Notice she hasn't had much to say about your last post. Probably shell shocked.
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